Before we get started I’m going to need you to open up another tab and find some theme music for me. It doesn’t have to be much, maybe The Call of Ktulu by Metallica or Holy Diver by Dio. Alright, you got it? Great, now we can get started. So, what do you think? I happen to like it, if you were curious. I enjoyed a comment from “Mrs. Who” very much and it inspired me to go in this direction.
“…if just one thing you say reaches deep to the heart of even just one person and opens their eyes to the wonderful world of Brother Jon, isn’t it worth it to keep posting?” ~ Mrs. Who
Isn’t this just about the greatest thing you’ve ever heard? Maybe not for you, but it sure is for me. I also heard from Madame Weebles, something to the effect of “do what you want, as long as you keep doing it.” Well, I’m gonna keep doing it. And I’m going to start with the hardest hitting subject of all time. The one thing that gets under my skin faster than anything else. The one instance that causes me to NOT have Christ like feelings. No, I’m not talking about driving. I’ve come to the realization that I’m the only person out there that knows how to drive correctly. I just keep to my self and stay out of everyone’s way. I’m talking about something so vile they don’t even let them in hospitals. (This may or may not be true. I didn’t research it, but I have seen a sign before.) I’m talking about cell phones, and in particular people not answering their cell phones.
Now, I’m not concerned with the person on the other end of MY line. If they don’t want to answer that’s fine. I’m talking about the people that are all around me that have a hard time picking up THEIR lines. It isn’t the fact that they are blatantly ignoring the person on the other end, I could care less about that. (I’m sure they’re all wonderful people, but that’s not what I’m talking about.) The problem I have is that these people have a so-called “smart” phone and they refuse to learn how to use them. I have a Droid powered touch screen cell phone. (I know, mister fancy pants, right?) If someone calls me I either answer it or send it straight to voice mail. You know what happens when you send it straight to voice mail? That’s right, it stops ringing. I also have a fancy button on the side of my phone that allows me to turn the ringer off, and still answer it. As soon as it rings, I hit the button, look to see who it is (quietly) and decided whether or not to answer. I understand that this isn’t for everyone. Maybe a person can’t see or hear as well. Maybe they accidentally shut off the vibration mode. Maybe there is all manner of things that keep people from answering their phones in a prompt fashion. But, there is no excuse for some of the ringers that people have decided to use nowadays. Here are some of my favorites.
- The Bicycle Horn – For the person that didn’t get the chance to annoy you enough while you were kids. Now they can from the comfort of their own EVERYWHERE.
- The Nuclear Meltdown Alarm – For the person who thinks they live in a Steven Segal straight to DVD movie. Seriously, have you ever even seen a power plant?
- The TV Theme Song – For the person that has never actually stepped foot in New York, San Fransisco, Seattle, Cleveland, or even Springfield. (Bonus points if you can name these TV shows)
- The 80′s Hit – For the person that doesn’t know how to just let it go. I lived as this person for a little while, but I grew out of it quickly. I once had “Tempted” by Squeeze as a ringtone. All good and fun until it went of during a Sunday Church Lesson.
- The Turkey Call and Shot Gun Shot – For the person that has a Red, White and Blue cell phone cover. They are the epitome of ‘Merican and will say “you can pry these guns from my cold dead hands.” (I actually would like to go turkey hunting sometime, so……just kidding.)
- The Classic Ringer – For the person who has grown into his big boy pants and is ready to take on the world. Epic, awesome, great, wonderful and cute people use this ringer. Any guesses on which ringer I like to use?
So, what ringer do you use? Is there something out there that can boil your blood faster than anything else? Woosah, woosah. Sorry about that. Count back from ten. Alright, count back from a hundred then.
I’m going to do my best in not letting this kind of stuff bother me, but I’m going to ask you to please, just answer your phone. If we need help to calm ourselves we can remember this;
These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. ~ John 16: 33